For most of her life, Liz Walton saw motherhood as the natural progression after marriage – a cherished milestone to be embraced, just as her parents had before her.

But she had no idea of the battle she’d face trying to fall pregnant.

When Liz met her now-husband Greg at 35, she knew time wasn’t on her side.

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The couple tied the knot in 1999 and started trying for a baby almost immediately.

But two years went by and Liz still hadn’t fallen pregnant.

‘I started to question myself, asking, “What’s wrong with me? What’s wrong with my body? I want to have a baby,”‘ Liz, now 56, recalled.

Every negative pregnancy test shattered their hopes and hearts.

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From there, they had no choice but to go to a fertility specialist in search of answers.

Liz blamed herself and felt like a failure, which put strain on her relationship with Greg.

Then, to her surprise, tests revealed Greg had anti-sperm antibodies (ASAs) – immune proteins that mistakenly attack sperm cells.

Women can also have ASAs, which can be produced when exposed to sperm. The condition can occur in otherwise fertile men and women, interfering with conception.

It is estimated that one in 16 men in Australia produce ASAs, although research is needed. Infertility affects one in six couples, with male factors contributing to 50 per cent of cases.

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These rarely talked-about antibodies were the reason the couple had been struggling to fall pregnant naturally and doctors told them it was unlikely they ever would.

‘IVF was our only option – we didn’t have any other choice,’ Liz said.

‘I hated my body and myself. For me, I found it very difficult, especially when our friends started getting pregnant. I didn’t know how to handle the emotions.’

Looking back, Liz wishes there had been support, because she and Greg had no idea where to turn for help with their fertility struggles.

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‘It put a massive strain on our marriage. We questioned if we should stay together. We didn’t always know how to deal with it,’ Liz said.

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‘There were a lot of tears and I felt awful for my husband.’

Each round of IVF took about a month and involved both egg retrieval and transfer – an experience Liz described as ‘incredibly invasive’.

After each procedure, they faced a nerve-wracking two-week wait to find out if it had worked.

‘It felt like a two-month wait because you’re holding your breath to see if it worked or not,’ Liz said.

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The first failed attempt left them devastated, but they persevered.

‘I did three rounds in a row, took a break, then went through another three,’ Liz recalled.

‘I saw a therapist because I was desperate to try and understand myself and my body to find the key.’

Throughout IVF, Liz supported herself with healthy eating, a nutrition plan, hypnotherapy, meditation, and acupuncture to help manage the emotional strain.

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With each cycle, the stress intensified, forcing her to take breaks from treatment.

After pushing through six unsuccessful rounds, Liz reached a breaking point and needed time to recover. Eventually, she and Greg decided to stop IVF altogether.

‘I remember my husband kept saying, “My sperm is dead – we’ve got to move on.” I desperately wanted to talk about it, but he didn’t. It was all too much,’ she said.

During this time, Liz’s friends and family were supportive, but she still felt deeply isolated by infertility and hurt by well-meaning but insensitive comments.

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‘If God wanted you to have a baby, you would have one,’ some said. Others told her to “just relax and it would happen”.’

‘I just wanted to be a mum,’ Liz said.

Liz and Greg discussed options like adoption, but she was told she was too old to start the process.

Over ten years, the couple spent $60,000 on six rounds of IVF and $30,000 on counselling, holistic therapies and fertility support.

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Just as Liz, by then 46, was about to give up hope, everything changed.

At Christmas, as she prepared to enjoy the holidays, Liz suddenly felt unwell.

‘I thought I was starting menopause – I felt awful, sick and nauseous, but we’d been told pregnancy wasn’t possible,’ she said.

A visit to her GP revealed the unexpected: Liz was pregnant.

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‘I was in total shock. I thought, “There’s no way, it’s impossible,”‘ she recalled.

Still disbelieving, Liz bought several pregnancy tests – every single one was positive.

Against the odds, Liz had fallen pregnant naturally at the age of 46. The couple was thrilled by the news.

She believes that letting go of the overwhelming mental load of ‘trying’ and focusing on her relationship unlocked something that was holding them back from conceiving.

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‘When my husband and I started reconnecting, enjoying each other’s company and liking each other again, that’s when it happened,’ she said.

‘It really made me understand the impact pressure and stress has on the body. When you’re stressed, the body produces high levels of cortisol and adrenaline. We also create inflammation in the body that impacts both women and men massively.’

But once she had her 12-week scan, new fears crept in.

‘The baby had too much fluid behind her neck and her nuchal translucency, meaning her head was too big. Due to my age, they were looking at chromosomal issues too, possibly Down’s syndrome,’ she said.

‘That was one of the most challenging, deepest spiritual experiences ever because I had to remain calm and be okay with not knowing the outcome. Otherwise, any stress I felt could have impacted the baby.’

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Then at 24 weeks, the doctors had some good news – the couple’s baby was perfectly healthy.

Liz gave birth to a perfect baby girl, who is now ten.

‘In its own bizarre, strange way, the experience gave me the best tools to become the best mother I could be that I wouldn’t have learned if I’d never had the fertility path,’ Liz said.

‘We need to normalise talking about fertility in our 40s. Not just the success stories, but the cost, the grief, and the courage it takes to keep going.’

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Now Liz is a fertility coach who helps other women navigate through their own fertility journeys.

Feeling there was a lack of safe, supportive spaces for those navigating this journey, Liz joined forces with fertility therapist Helen Zee to launch the Melbourne Fertility Expo.