Earlier this year, I found myself sprawled on a medical bed, blissfully inhaling happy gas and waiting for the numbing cream to work its magic.

Before I knew it, a friendly nurse had injected a small amount of filler into my lips and I couldn’t help thinking, ‘How lucky am I to be able to pop in on my lunch break and stroll out with a fresh blast of confidence?’

For years, I’ve taken these simple pick-me-ups for granted – and let’s be honest, most women have too.

Boobs you don’t love? No worries, implants are just an appointment away. Wrinkles driving you mad? Easy – kick back and enjoy a quick jab of Botox. Not thrilled by your height? Slip on some heels and your legs will look sensational.

But for men, it’s not so simple. While we happily book our little ‘refreshers’ on a whim, they’ve been conditioned to quietly accept whatever the gene pool served up.

Sure, they’ll joke about their receding hairlines, but you won’t hear them at brunch griping about their package or swapping specialist recommendations the way women chat about boob jobs.

Well, not until this year…

It seems that almost overnight, men’s insecurities have burst into the spotlight like never before.

Yes, we’ve all heard of Rogaine and those hair transplant holidays to Turkey, but lately, the male makeover game has seriously levelled up.

While women are plumping up their lips, men are now adding filler somewhere else: their peckers.

Yes, apparently there’s now a simple, non-surgical medical procedure that can add serious girth to a penis… and it can be over and done with in a lunch break.

Oh science, you really are a problem solver.

The procedure, known as penile filler, involves injecting hyaluronic acid – the same stuff women have been putting in their lips and cheeks for decades – into the shaft to create extra volume and a more uniform shape.

It’s quick, relatively painless, and doesn’t affect sensation or sexual performance.

Curious about the hype, I decided to investigate. Surely it can’t be the miracle fix it claims to be, right?

I mean, wouldn’t women notice if their partner was sporting a few extra centimetres of width overnight?

So, I spoke to Chris Fleischer, practice manager at Cosmetic Connection, to get the inside scoop – and for any man considering the treatment, there’s good news, and a few eyebrow-raising surprises.

‘It’s quite a simple procedure that enlarges the size of the penis. It primarily focuses on the girth, but it’s non-surgical – you can walk in and walk out the same day,’ Chris told me.

He said it’s done under local anaesthetic so there’s very little discomfort, and the whole thing takes about 20 minutes.

Give whoever invented this a Nobel Prize, I say!

Sadly, the revamped penis can’t be used right away. ‘You cannot use it the same day,’ Chris explained. ‘There’s a recovery period of at least two weeks.’

Two weeks! Imagine finally scoring your dream upgrade, only to be told you’ve got to wait a fortnight to take it for a spin. No wonder it’s the most common question Chris gets asked.

Clinics have seen a huge rise in bookings from men of all ages, especially those in their 40s who are newly single and back on dating apps for the first time in years.

‘It’s not one type of guy,’ Chris told me.

‘You get young men who are insecure, older men who’ve experienced shrinkage, and even some who just want their partner to enjoy sex more after childbirth.’

In fact, some clinics now perform up to ten of these procedures a week – and the results speak for themselves.

Now for those wanting extra length, the news isn’t brilliant.

Because while it can stretch things out slightly, filler mainly focuses on increasing girth. ‘For the non-surgical option, length gains aren’t possible,’ Chris added.

But there’s good news, fellas. Research (and, if I’m honest, my own preference) says that women favour width over length.

It’s not about being long – it’s about being strong and thick.

So yes, on paper, willy filler sounds like a winner. But as with most cosmetic quick fixes, there’s a catch.

Sadly, the results don’t last forever. ‘It can last up to around three to five years,’ Chris explained. ‘We usually recommend people come back every two years for a top-up.’

And it’s not cheap either. Prices range from $5,000 to $10,000 depending on how much filler is used.

It’s also worth considering a scenario where a woman has become accustomed to the, er, enhanced experience – only to find herself disappointed when her partner decides to stop the treatment. That’s got to be a tough conversation…

So yes, the good news is that you can get a bigger penis if you really want one – but it’s going to cost you, and you’ll have to maintain it.

And lastly, the million-dollar question: can women tell if a man has had it done? Chris told me: ‘If it’s done well, you can’t tell.’

I’ve always saidit’s not about the size, it’s about the motion in the ocean.

So my advice to men insecure about their girth: save your money and get skilled at pleasing your woman with other things – rhythm, fingers, foreplay and tongue.

Our orgasms will thank you for it. Your bank account might, too.